Updated: Dec 4, 2020
My two goals in life are to continue learning and growing. I have a passion for learning; an eager beaver that dives head first in all that I do. I believe that I can achieve anything I put my mind too. As I believed when I was a child. Because of this I have been called a dreamer many times. At times, a little whisper tries to sway me, saying my goals are not reachable. But I push it away and focus on honoring my inner child.
Being the person that I am, as described above, has an up side and a down side.
THE UP SIDE
I have passed the last 13 months passionately, studying, practicing though the first 3 levels of the Essentrics Academy. I was even able to save enough money to attend a Live Teacher Training in Montreal for levels 3 and 4. Spending every free time I had to study, review and learn to better myself as an Essentrics Instructor for myself and for my participants.
I reached my goals within the time frame I set for myself. Experiencing an amazing journey and making new friends along the way. That my deadline was not feasible. That there was too much to study and to cover before that date. Friends and family often believed I was putting too much pressure on myself.
THE DOWN SIDE
At times it can get quite stressful and overwhelming to be such a person. I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself. The closer I got to my deadline, the more stressed I was. I felt like an elastic that was wound up tight.
However, once I finished the test (and passed 👍) I fell in a 3-day depression. Always feeling like crying, drained and tired in spite of sleeping nine restful hours a night. What was going on?
As the stress left my body, I felt more and more down. Wanting to just quit everything and unplug from my day-to-day life. I remember thinking that for some, going on a resort or on a cruise would be the solution. But somehow, I knew that at this time, it wouldn’t help. That it was not quite what I needed.
Then one evening I decided to pick up one of the Miranda books that I own. Thinking that maybe I was going through a withdrawal from studying somehow. So that night I read a bit of Aging Backwards and felt the “down” feeling melt away. Am I finding my balance?
Be your own cheerleading squad. Believe in yourself. Stay true to your dreams and to yourself. And in doing so, respect and honor your level of energy on a day-to-day basis. We cannot give 120%. That is simply impossible. We only can offer 100%. My belief is you should be giving out what you can while keeping enough energy for yourself. Always be kind to “you”.
I am still trying to figure out what truly all this is about. Why I felt down. Was it because I had been so stressed for so long? I have heard what stress does to our brain. Not nice. Also scary as I have lived through depression in the past. I do not want to ever relive those 10 yrs of depression.
Was it because, in spite of teaching 3 classes a week and learning a new learning a new pre-choreographed workout, I was somehow needing to “read/study” .. a form of withdrawal?
Whatever the reason, I am starting to feel better and still trying to figure this all out. I feel a need to understand this in order to help me in the future should it happen again. Or even maybe understand how to avoid the “down” to reoccur.
Have you gone through something similar? Would you be willing to share your tips and comments below? I would truly appreciate it if we could keep the conversation going.
Yours in health, happiness and success, Nancy Shimmy